Deaf rabid mob boss seeks nuns?

It’s Friday, which is traditionally quiz time here at Classical Values. Last week I was not only busy with out-of-town visitors, but there’s such a dearth of online tests that it takes forever to find them. And so, because I don’t want this to be a “blogligation” I took a mini Fourth of July holiday.
But now it’s serious test time! First, from Michele at A Small Victory I found a fascinating quiz called “20 Questions to a Better Personality.”

Wackiness: 50/100
Rationality: 62/100
Constructiveness: 50/100
Leadership: 56/100

You are an SRDL–Sober Rational Destructive Leader. This makes you a mob boss. You are the ultimate alpha person and even your friends give you your space. You can’t stand whiners, weaklings, schlemiels or schlemozzles. You don’t make many jokes, but when you do, others laugh out loud. They must.
People often turn to you for advice, and wisely. You are calm in a crisis, cautious in a tempest, and attuned to even the finest details. Yours is the profile of a smart head for business and a dangerous enemy.
You have a natural knack for fashion and occupy a suit like a matinee idol. Your charisma is striking and without artifice. You are generous, thoughtful, and appreciate life’s finer things.
Please don’t kick my ass.

Kick your ass? Frankly, the testers HURT me when they said that! Hear that, testers?
YOU HURT ME!
In all honesty, I’ve never thought of myself as a mob boss or a leader or a matinee idol, but I’m flattered. By the way, here are the choices of other personality types.
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What kind of music is a mob boss supposed to like? Nathan Cardon links to the Dead German Composer Test, which gave me another flattering result.

Take the Dead German Composer Test!

(That’s OK, because Beethoven couldn’t hear what he wrote, and neither can I.)
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If I’m a mob boss and a dead German composer, then I guess I need to know what I died of, and whether I’m damned.
As to the former, I found a test called “Which Horrible Affliction are you?”
I get to be RABIES!
I am Rabies. Grrrrrrrr!
Which Horrible Affliction are you?
A Rum and Monkey disease.
This means I froth at the mouth and my bite is worse than my bark.
Hmmmmm………
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Last of all, we come to my eventual destiny, by means of a test called “Are You Damned?”
From the looks of the results, I guess I am.
Sex With Nuns
Are You Damned?
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey
Odd, because I’m not into that sort of thing.
Must be another annoying metaphor…..


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4 responses to “Deaf rabid mob boss seeks nuns?”

  1. Steven Malcolm Anderson the Lesbian-worshipping gun-loving selfish aesthete Avatar

    Wackiness: 20/100
    Rationality: 20/100
    Constructiveness: 40/100
    Leadership: 60/100
    You are an SEDL–Sober Emotional Destructive Leader. This makes you a dictator . You prefer to control situations, and lack of control makes you physically sick. You feel have responsibility for everyone’s welfare, and that you will be blamed when things go wrong. Things do go wrong, and you take it harder than you should.
    You rely on the validation and support of others, but you have a secret distrust for people and distaste for their habits and weaknesses that make you keep your distance from them. This makes you very difficult to be with romantically. Still, a level-headed peacemaker can keep you balanced.
    Despite your fierce temper and general hot-bloodedness, you have a soft spot for animals and a surprising passion for the arts. Sometimes you would almost rather live by your wits in the wilderness somewhere, if you could bring your books and your sketchbook.
    You also have a strange, undeniable sexiness to you. You may go insane.

  2. Steven Malcolm Anderson (Cato the Elder) the Lesbian-worshipping gun-loving selfish aesthete Avatar

    ….which means that I am really President Richard Milhous Nixon, the absolute dictator of the total population of the earth, in other words, _the first ruler of the world_, according to the John Birch Society.
    Hmmm…. I thought I was Spiro Agnew.
    Damn! I gave so many good Catholic responses in order to have sex with nuns that they said I was going to Heaven! Damn!
    I’m syphilis and Ludwig von Beethoven.

  3. Varius Contrarius Avatar
    Varius Contrarius

    I’m Franz Schubert: unassuming master of melody. Not bad.

  4. triticale Avatar

    It’s ok to experiment with sex with nuns – just don’t get in the habit…