Forgive me for being slow. I’ve been swamped lately, and until today I had no idea how important John Kerry’s choice of John Edwards was.
But then I read this:
You may have also heard that the man I selected is John Edwards of North Carolina.
(APPLAUSE) And I want you to know we think this is a dream ticket. We’ve got better vision. We’ve got better ideas. We’ve got real plans. We’ve got a better sense of what’s happening to America. And we’ve got better hair. I’ll tell you that goes a long way.
Kerry is right, of course. Just ask any of the Big Three newscasters; better hair goes a long way!
The war? It’s no more than a national bad hair day; nothing that can’t be cured by a newly invigorated scalp.
Forget terrorism; better hair is serious business!
Aren’t some things worth dyeing for?
Comments
8 responses to “The war gets hairy!”
For a minute, I thought that last sentence was a typo.
Er.. Like my last sentence. Sheesh.
Typo fixo!
🙂
Their hair is too long. They need haircuts. They all need haircuts. And so do I.
Normally I would consider such personal characteristics irrelevant in the extreme. But, THEY BROUGHT IT UP!
Of course you would. Youre not as nuanced as the Dems. If you were more sophisticated (as they are) you would realize what deep and forthright conviction is demonstrated by a nice head of hair. Proper attention to grooming = proper attitude towards governing and correct position on the issues. I propose in future elections, the candidates not be allowed to speak at all. We’ll just bring in a panel of hairstylists (and maybe a phrenologist or two) and have them elect our national leadership. Unless of course, they couldnt figure out how to use the punch cards.
Could the whole anti-war movement really be a function of people preferring Saddam’s hair to Bush’s?
Bonfire of the Vanities, #54
Welcome to the web’s 54th edition of the Bonfire of the Vanities, the weekly roundup of self-appointed rubbish from the blogosphere. Submissions seem to pretty much cover the entire spectrum of rubbish. Some lean towards the humorous-but-completely…