The world explained, whether I like it or not

The world of course cannot be explained, but I think Burroughs came dangerously close when he divided the world into Johnsons (who mind their own business) and Shits (who do just the opposite):

‘The Johnson Family’ was a turn-of-the-century expression to designate good bums and thieves.  It was elaborated into a code of conduct.  A Johnson honors his obligations.  His word is good and he is a good man to do business with.  A Johnson minds his own business.  He is not a snoopy, self-righteous, trouble-making person.  A Johnson will give help when help is needed.  He will not stand by while someone is drowning or trapped under a burning car.(1)

In his essay “The Johnson Family,” Burroughs elaborates on the Johnsons’ philosophical placement within his mythic system—explicitly linked them to Manichaeistic dualism:

The Johnson family formulates a Manachean position where good and evil are in conflict and the outcome is at this point uncertain.  It is not an eternal conflict since one or the other must win a final victory.(2)

Unlike the Johnsons, Shits are obsessed with minding other’s business.  They are the town busy body, the preacher, the lawman.  Shits are incapable of taking the honorable road of each-to-his-own.  Burroughs describes the situation in his essay “My Own Business” thus:

This world would be a pretty easy and pleasant place to live in if everybody could just mind his own business and let others do the same.  But a wise old black faggot said to me years ago: ‘Some people are shits, darling.” I was never able to forget it.(3)

In Burroughs’ mythology, the world is one of conflict between the Johnsons and the Shits.  A Shit is one who is obsessively sure of his own position at the cost of all other vantages.  Burroughs describes Shits as incapable of minding “their own business, because they have no business of their own to mind, any  more than a small pox virus has.”(4)  This is more than a offhanded analogy.  For Burroughs, Shits are, in actuality, virus occupied hosts—chronically infected by what he terms the Right virus.  “The mark of a basic Shit,” Burroughs reminds us, “is that he has to be right.”(5)

Problem is, the people Burroughs called “the Shits” end up running everything. Having to be right means having to lead, and leading leads to a lot of wrong. More evil has been done in the name of goodness than in the name of evil.

Far from solving the problem, acknowledging it is an exercise in futility.


Posted

in

by

Tags:

Comments

7 responses to “The world explained, whether I like it or not”

  1. Randy Avatar
    Randy

    The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Sadly, all those folks out there with “good” intentions agree with that statement. They just think it always applies to someone else’s intentions, not their own.

  2. captain arizona Avatar
    captain arizona

    No matter how complex a problem is there is always someone who will come up with a simple solution that is usually wrong. Demand the little illegal alien children coming into our country be saved. This is a complex issue that I do not have a simple solution for. Save the children.

  3. Man Mountain Molehill Avatar
    Man Mountain Molehill

    Of course the shits run everything, the Johnsons don’t want to and can’t be bothered.

    Lately I’ve been wondering how so many legislative initiatives sounded like a good idea at the time and morphed into giant, intrusive and downright destructive bureaucracies.

    EPA, who wants a poisonous environment? Morphs into destroying millions of acres of productive farm land to save the delta smelt and so on…
    OSHA, nobody wants workers to get ground up in the machines, a la Metropolis… Welfare, nobody wants starving poor people dying in the streets…

    The police, public order turns into SWAT raids on little old grannies.

    Pournelle’s iron law law of bureaucracy obtains, I guess.

    There’s an overwhelming number of shits in each main party, wondering if either dominates the shit quotient?

  4. guy Avatar
    guy

    “He will not stand by while someone is drowning or trapped under a burning car.”

    Which means onerous taxation is a good and necessary thing. Since someone, somewhere is always in need of help and you can’t be everwhere at once you need fire/police/giant totalitarian government to save the poor childrens.

  5. Veeshir Avatar

    The problem is that there are also a lot of people who want the shits to tell them what to do.

    Have you seen Team America?

    Dicks f*ck pussies but they also f*ck assholes and if they don’t f*ck a-holes, we’ll all be covered in shit.

    What made me think of that was “Johnson” family.

  6. Eric Scheie Avatar

    Yeah, and it’s also a bit of a challenge to fight the shits without becoming one.

    My grandfather had a favorite saying: “Never get in a peeing contest with a skunk!”

  7. pst314 Avatar
    pst314

    “good bums and thieves…the honorable world of hobos and criminals”

    Sounds like a rather limited idea of “good”.