Who will police the costume police?

In case anyone thinks that wars on holidays (such as Christmas) are part of a demonic secular anti-Christian campaign, things have reached the point where there is actually a war on Halloween:

The student-governments of rival schools Oregon State University and the University of Oregon have announced a temporary partnership, which is kind of like how it would be if Negan from The Walking Dead could somehow join forces with Ramsay Bolton.

And why are these villains teaming up? (UO and OSU, not Negan and Ramsay.) You can probably guess: they want to play Halloween costume police.

In a strongly worded email to students at both campuses, student-government presidents Rachel Grisham and Quinn Haaga warned their communities that acts of cultural appropriation “are not acceptable.” Full stop.

Seriously:

Cultural appropriation is the act of borrowing or using aspects of a culture by another culture, typically a dominant culture. Around the time of Halloween, we often see people dressing as a culture or a character, which is offensive and reinforces negative stereotypes. These costumes reinforce racism, sexism, and classism. As active and respectful members of the OSU and the UO communities, we expect everyone to not engage in cultural appropriation.

Huh? I thought only crackpot fundamentalist Christians were fighting a war against Halloween, but I guess not.

Is it only costumes the leftist bigots are after?

What about pumpkins?

Who owns them in the cultural sense?

Pumpkins, like other squash, are thought to have originated in North America. The oldest evidence, pumpkin-related seeds dating between 7000 and 5500 BC, was found in Mexico.

Uh oh!

Did I culturally appropriate what I put on my front porch earlier?

I hope so!

Because cultural appropriation is a classical tradition!

So HAPPY HALLOWEEN!

Take that bigots!