I’m in a bad place right now and I am taking things too hard. Last night I was apoplectic over the apparent inevitability of Newt Gingrich’s candidacy, and it really, really hurts. That’s because I am a Republican, and even though I am a libertarian Republican, I think of myself as a loyal person. For years I defended Bush despite my problems with him. My thinking is that if there is any hope of this country going in a libertarian direction, it has to come from the Republican Party. In any case, it damn sure isn’t going to come from the Democratic Party.

But Newt Gingrich is so anti-libertarian that he is the anti-libertarian’s Anti-Libertarian. The Anti-Libertarian in chief, if you will. And if he becomes the standard bearer for the Republican Party, that means libertarianism is dead in the Republican Party. I worry that I cannot remain in such a party, and it really sucks, because I am a very pragmatic person with shockingly low standards.

And Newt Gingrich crosses a line that’s hard to cross, because I’m not into drawing lines, and barely have one.

He violates my shockingly low standards. He offends my shallow and flexible principles.

I don’t know what to do. I have not discussed my political involvement much in this blog, but I am involved in local Republican politics, and I know that Republicans will be expected to pull together, support, and work for whomever the candidate is. But if that candidate is Gingrich, that is something I cannot do. While I might be able to vote for him (and even for that I’d feel guilty for the rest of my life), enthusiasm is simply beyond my capacity. The man is a statist’s statist, and on the drug war, a fascist’s fascist. Plus I don’t like his personality. In short, the man sickens me. Seeing that this is what I think, how I am I supposed to be a loyal Republican?

Disloyalty is not my shtick.

Any thoughts are welcome.