Impurities are contaminating the purity of our recyclables, and the trashiness of our trash!

I got quite a kick out of this story about the DC resident who was fined thousands of dollars for not recycling contaminated recyclables:

Dupont Circle resident Patricia White says she has been fined eight times for throwing homemade cat litter in her trash. The fines total $2,000. White says she shreds old newspaper and junk mail to use as cat litter. She believes she is helping the environment by reusing the paper and avoiding cat litter you will find in stores.

After being fined several times, White says she called the Department of Public Works inspector who issued the tickets. According to White, the inspector admitted to digging through trash looking for violations. White even appealed the violations in D.C. court. Judge Audrey Jenkins agreed with the inspector after White explained the situation. FOX 5 tried to reach Judge Jenkins, but her office has declined to comment.

Isn’t it nice to know they’re finally getting tough on real crime in the nation’s capital?

Recycling started as a way to separate things like cans and bottles from regular trash. In those days, it was easy. But thanks to predictable bureaucratic escalation (by people who want more power and more jobs for their class, natch), it has turned into an almost comical war against impure trash. “Commingling” has become the latest crime, and in the case of the woman who uses newspaper as cat litter, she could be cited for putting her shitty newspapers in either container! Ditto the criminal scumbags who dare to use old newspaper in bird or hamster cages! You may not recycle it, and you may not throw it away!

Garbage must be free of recyclables, and recyclables must be free of garbage.

Hear hear.

Did you know that if you put a cardboard pizza box in your recycle bin, you are guilty of contamination if there are remnants of grease on it? In many communities, the same applies to unwashed peanut butter jars, dog or cat food bags, paper napkins, frozen food containers, and milk cartons. And one of the worst offenders is Tyvek mailing envelopes, which are said to wreak havoc with the paper shredding machines.

As to which is a greater crime? Putting trash in the recyclables, or recyclables in the trash? Why not simplify the process, and simply declare that Everything Should Be Recycled and therefore Nothing Can Be Put In The Trash, and also that Everything Is Too impure To Be Recycled? (Like the direction we’re headed with regulations governing water runoff; it is too polluted to go into city storm drains, and too “clean” to be allowed in sewers.)  If only Lewis Carroll could weigh in….

I love government Catch-22 situations.


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9 responses to “Impurities are contaminating the purity of our recyclables, and the trashiness of our trash!”

  1. Bobnormal Avatar

    I save my Aluminum cans and everything else goes into the trash, it’s just not worth it, with all the regs you have to follow,
    Bob

  2. rjp Avatar

    Couple of things.

    Definition of stupid: doing the exact same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Come on, EIGHT times?

    A DPW employee that picks through cat pissed and shit on shredded paper? What else was she looking for? Credit card offers?

    The fresh fragrance of Patricia White’s home — because we all enjoy eau de cat shit’n’piss. It’s friggin newspaper, it isint going to absorb any odors.

  3. Jimmyk Avatar
    Jimmyk

    rjp What else was she looking for?
    Drug use. You see only those who can
    lawfully stick there finger up your ass,
    With consent.
    Can tell what controlled drugs you can lawfully use.

    The fresh fragrance of Patricia White’s home — because we all enjoy eau de cat shit’n’piss. It’s friggin newspaper, it isint going to absorb any odors.

    You ever hear of baking soda.

  4. PJ Avatar
    PJ

    In Los Angeles, the city hired 7 “trash ambassadors” at $70K each to go around and inspect and advise people on their recycling habits. Bet they’re union jobs!

  5. Mike Pechar Avatar

    Sad but chucklable.

  6. karrde Avatar

    What would they have done if the soiled paper was disposed of in a (contained) backyard fire?

    I doubt that it would smell pleasant to the neighbors.

  7. Janet C Avatar
    Janet C

    So is she suppose to bury it?

  8. rhhardin Avatar

    How do you know whether something is a resource or trash?

    Somebody will pay you for a resource.

  9. Mark Alger Avatar

    The true crime here is the government’s gratuitous meddling in what ought to be a purely private market transaction.

    If trash has a value, someone will buy it. If they won’t, it has no value and should be disposed of.

    The value that a public dump provides is that it keeps trash off the streets and out of public spaces — benefits thereof being aesthetic and sanitary. The idiots who wish to control the lives of others have it backwards — AS USUAL. They’re trying mightly to keep trash OUT of dumps with their addlepated recycling policies.

    ALL of this is an affront to liberty, which is a violation of our fundamental social compact.

    The real criminals are the trash narcs, and they are deserving of ostracism at the very least.

    M