I thought I was alone in noticing a very annoying habit, but it looks like I am not. Anyway, earlier in my (very crowded) gym I noticed something I have noticed repeatedly: assholes pace back and forth in the aisles of the locker room. Why?
Because they are on the phone, that’s why. Normal people do not normally pace in crowded areas. But these are not normal people; they are assholes. And for reasons which I cannot explain, assholes tend to pace when they are talking on the phone.
Right there, perhaps I am intolerantly judging others by my own standards. I mean, just because I don’t pace when I’m on the phone in the locker room does not mean others shouldn’t, right? No, even that is less than fully accurate; while it is true that I don’t pace when I am on the phone in the locker room, I never, ever use my phone in the locker room. And if for some totally bizarre reason I absolutely HAD to, I would not pace back and forth. I would walk into the most private place I could find. I don’t pace around in public because it strikes me as rude and animalistic. Is that rude of me to make this observation? Or am I being subjected to rudeness? Honestly, sometimes I am unable to understand the very world I live in.
Why do people do this, anyway? Here’s one possible explanation:
Maybe their brains are confused because they’re talking to someone, and hearing them, but they’re not there. So they just get this compulsion to get up and go towards the person they’re talking to, like when you’re trying to talk to someone in another room and end up following them in there so you don’t have to shout and can see them. But there’s no one there, so they end up just pacing around.
Sorry, but that sounds like an excuse for stupidity.
Frankly, the behavior is a good argument for rules against using cell phones in locker rooms in the first place. Except that’s a lame argument, because my gym already has a rule against talking on cell phones in locker rooms.
Like most such “rules,” it is obeyed only by nice people.
Rules intended for nice people are not enforced against assholes, because that would violate society’s (in this case corporate) policies. Just try to get a theater to silence an asshole who won’t stop yakking in a theater. You will be offered a refund, and that’s it.
The assholes remain, no matter what.
Comments
13 responses to “Where is Hannibal Lecter when we need him?”
I tend to pace while talking on the phone. However, I don’t do it in public where it would be annoying.
I pace because it helps me think–I don’t know why. I’ve been classified as having a kinesthetic learning style, at least in part. Maybe that has something to do with it. I pace when I’m thinking hard about something, and I’m not particularly verbal. (Verbal/visual, yes, so I write expressively, but that’s a different story). So pacing somehow helps me get the words out.
I would pace when I’m having a conversation face-to-face, too, but that seems vaguely rude so I don’t do it. I don’t pace when I’m talking on the phone in public, because that seems vaguely rude so I don’t do it. Of course, I think using my cell phone in public at all is vaguely rude, because then I’m not engaging the people around me, so I try not to do that either.
So perhaps it would be more accurate to say that borderline sociopaths who are kinesthetic learners pace while using their cell phones in public.
I discovered this blog today and was excited to find something called “classic values.” This was the firs post that I read here and, unfortunately, I realized that it is not what I assumed it would be.
By only the second sentence, the author of this post, who was ranting about the rudeness they felt that they were being subjected to, began to use offensive and profane language. Apparently, this author feels that using vulgar language is a “classic value.”
What a shame,
I’m a pacer. I pace when I talk on a phone. I pace when I’m waiting on the microwave. I pace sometimes just to pace. I frequently pace in conversations(of course, with a new baby, that’s because any conversation is done during about five other tasks!). I do a LOT of walking for my job (a hike of several miles through desert mountain ranges to get to where my task starts is not unusual), and I enjoy walking. Like Horatio Hornblower, it helps me think. If I’m on the phone, I usually pace–because while it’s not a default, it’s a habit.
That said, I never do so in locker rooms. I generally don’t do exercises in gyms (I tend to prefer outdoor martial arts), so it doesn’t often come up; however, when I AM in a locker room, I use it to transition from gym to outer world (where things like body odor and gym cloths are not the norm). Plus, it’s a very public place, and while I don’t have anything to hide I see no reason to let that many strangers in on my private life. Any phone conversation is going to be quick and to the point (I prefer that anyway), so there shouldn’t be time to pace.
I agree that these people are rude, but don’t think they’re pathological. This is little different from road rage or the like–they simply refuse to examine their actions from the outside. Honestly, I doubt most of them realize they’re bothering anyone; with as ubiquitous as cell phones are, they probably think we all should be used to it.
As for the language thing, sorry, but the Classics aren’t as clean as people think. They just used different vulgar language. Foul language–and this blog post is not an example of such–is as classical as philosophy and more classical than white marble statues (they were actually quite gawdy). If you’re put off by the package a message is delivered in, that shows a certain shallowness on your part. I’d rather hear an intelligent idea expressed in the crudest forms than a vile idea expressed in the most sophisticated and erudite fashion.
Joseph,
We go for a LOT of irony around here. Evidently that sort of thing weights you down.
If it helps thing of classical Naval values. Enlisted men. Officers are excused.
An armed society is a polite society.
Seems a society ‘armed’ with cellphones is the opposite.
I’ve noticed that many people talking/texting/surfing on cell phones automatically demand that others get out of their way in crowded areas. In airport gate areas, stores, any other crowded public places, the responsibility is on the non-cell phone user to make sure no collisions occur, or a least that’s how the cell phone users behave. Young female cell phone users especially expect everyone to get out of their way because, darn it, they are DOING IMPORTANT THINGS, having VERY IMPORTANT CONVERSATIONS. This behavior is similar to women (rarely men) pushing strollers, who automatically assume the right of way no matter what because, obviously, they’re pushing around their precious childern.
Right on cue, when the appropriateness of vulgarity and profanity is challenged, people jump out and start defending their use. I don’t even know what to say to the person who stated that they would rather people use vulgarities when topics are discussed.
Because I believe that crude language is offensive, unimaginative and should be avoided, it means that I am shallow? Would you be in support of elementary school teachers cursing while teaching class? Would you be in favor of curriculum that required children to use profanity? Might pastors and priests benefit by hearing how their sermons might bring more glory to God by using such beautiful profanities?
It amazes me that, instead of pursuing paths to see how close we might get to being more beautiful and eloquent, most people fight for their right to see how far down into the muck and filth that they can descend to.
Also, the fact that people had also used vulgarities in the distant past does not mean that they are classical values. Using that same logic, since Henry Ford supported eugenics, does that make eugenics a classical value?
Once again, if someone is in favor of decency and wishes to speak out against crudeness, they are quickly made to look like a fool or a prude. You have successfully driven me away. Enjoy your excrement filled playground.
It didn’t occur to me that calling an asshole an asshole might be considered profane by some. While I tend to speak my mind somewhat freely from time to time, it certainly was not my goal to offend anyone with these observations, although it is pretty easy to offend people these days.
I am also sorry to say that despite the title of this blog, not everything I say is grounded in the classics. Far from it. However, to offer a little classical perspective to complement the general spirit of these comments, I would suggest boning up on Petronius.
http://www.shattercolors.com/nonfiction/baldwin_swearing.htm
Everywhere it’s the same, the “phone” Has become some strange Mind melded apparition of Western culture, stuck to people with a strange magnetic attraction,
🙂
umm, Joseph, Welcome, but remember, this is Eric’s house, if you don’t like the decor well then …..
Good Morning Eric
B
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Joseph,
Just because we don’t share your offense at the type of language being deployed here is no reason to get your knickers in a twist and berate us because we did not immediately endorse your style preferences. It’s possible that we find the content more important than the style.
Be that as it may, I find it interesting that you feel it legitimate to take offense because members of this forum state their preference for their stylistic approach as opposed to your recommended one and yet you apparently think that we should acquiesce, preferable without comment, to your stylistic assertions.
You can, of course, take your mouse click and go home in a huff, depriving yourself of the content on this site; that is your right. Or you could discipline yourself and offer commentary in which vulgarity was singularly absent, engage the content of the site rather than the style, and, shall we say, light a candle to illuminate us all.
But your approach leads me to believe that you would far rather curse the darkness.
[…] hardly obsessed with cell phone etiquette, but I recently complained about assholes pacing the aisles of crowded locker rooms while talking on the cell phone (this […]